Tag Archives: Godzilla

Summer Movie Preview


Love this guy.

It’s almost that time of year again: Summer Movie Season! *airhorn* No matter how jaded I get to the money-grubbing ways of Hollywood, I’m always excited for summer. I get burned by this excitement pretty regularly, but usually something unexpectedly great sneaks its way in. Last year, Man of Steel bored my red underpants off, but This Is The End was far funnier than a two-hour College Humor sketch should be. Also, Elysium was a g*ddamn mess, but I went home and watched District 9 for the 37th time, so all was good!

So, without further ado, let’s take a final look at these probable disasters before they eat your twelve dollars and waste two hours of your life!

(Preview, in this case, means unfairly judging a movie that I haven’t seen yet, based solely off marketing. Which is what you’re supposed to do, by the way. It’s called being a discerning consumer)

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Godzilla Still Looks Surprisingly Great

Hot on the heels of the giant, heaving pile of “meh” that was the Robocop re-make/boot/shrug, we have the trailer for Gareth Edwards’ Godzilla. While Hollywood certainly seems hell bent on fixing what isn’t broke – 1987 Robocop is g*ddamn perfect, I will fight you on this – it’s nice to see them trying to fix what they broke the f*ck out of sixteen years ago.


Yeah. That happened.

In addition to being a throwback to the monster movies of the 50’s, this also has a dash of 70’s government paranoia flavoring. The monologue by Bryan Cranston in particular seems to have been heavily influenced by the interrogation scene from Close Encounters of the Third Kind. Also, the references to the infamous Pacific nuclear testing contains two of my favorite tropes – the re-writing of history (X-Men: First Class did this very well with the Cuban Missile Crisis) and a clever twist on an old cliche; we didn’t create Godzilla with nukes, we were trying to kill his world-ruining ass with them.

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Godzilla vs Paratroopers

It’s that magical time of year again. December is that wonderful month when, between stressing the f*ck out over Christmas shopping, we can check out the trailers for the sure-to-be-disappointing upcoming summer movie season! The latest one to hit is Gareth Edwards’ remake of Godzilla. Edwards’ only notable film thus far is 2010’s low-key sci-fi drama Monsters. I enjoyed Monsters, mostly because it placed character development over visuals, although that could be because it cost roughly twelve dollars to produce.

This time, armed with a blockbuster budget and legendary franchise, Edwards seems to have put together quite a pretty movie, but there are some concerns. This is a very well-edited trailer (the 2001 music is a nice touch), but one wonders what a handful of paratroopers is going contribute in a fight against a Gila monster the size of the Burj Khalifa. I guess only the movie itself will tell. In the meantime, it can’t help but call up thoughts of  Transformers.  Three films deep and they still doesn’t realize Tyrese with a machine gun doesn’t do dick in a fight against giant robots.

You heard me, baldy.

You heard me, baldy.

Still, I’m tentatively excited, if only because this isn’t a Zach Snyder movie. That guy’s talent lies solely with making pretty trailers. Sorry. Had to be said.