*warning: softballs incoming*
According to the BBC, a probably hilarious fight broke out at the Norwich Sci-Fi and Film Convention in Norfolk, England. The event was organized by the Norwich Star Wars fan club, and the trouble started when a few Doctor Who fans, undeterred by the odor, arrived for autographs of some Who actors. This apparently didn’t sit well with the Star Wars fans, who probably should’ve named their convention something more g*ddamn specific if they didn’t want other sci-fi fanbases to show up.
After Norwich police subdued both parties with wedgies and pollen, the CCTV footage was reviewed and it was determined that no assault had taken place. Apparently the local Star Wars and Doctor Who fan clubs had been carrying a fierce rivalry for some time, and were then told by police to “stay away from each other.” It’s unclear who would win in a Lightsaber/Sonic Screwdriver fight, but much like in Alien vs Predator, it’s humanity that loses anyway. Continue reading
En Garde, ye lowly cannonfodder!
Any gamer worth his weight in Hot Pockets has read the glowing reviews by now. Now, as a lowly consumer who had to pay to play the damn thing, I’mma throw my belated two cents in: play that sh*t.
Did you play last year’s Deus Ex: Human Revolution, only to find it desperately lacking in plague rats and muttonchops? Are you a fan of the Bioshock series, but wish the gadgets ran on whale oil instead of steam (I call it F*ckPETAPunk)? Do you, like me, prefer an empire that is ruled by an Empress, because it totally reminds you of the Neverending Story, because that movie rules, except when Artax the horse drowns in the Swamp of Sadness and then the giant turtle oh god please fast-forward this part, grandma –
[Haven’t been on in awhile. recently got back into MC. gonna write some blogs about my experience. I’m gonna be using a lot of MC terminology without explanation. If you don’t understand, there are roughly a billion websites that will explain, starting with Minecraftwiki.net]
Argh. Damn you people. I created a world using the seed Artomix because it comes highly recommended around the internets. This seed is bullshit. Yeah, you spawn on a really cool-looking jungle island surrounded on ALL sides by a large ocean. Hey, that’s great. You know what’s missing here though? Every goddamn thing you need in this game that isn’t wood. One of the first priorities one must have when dropping into a new MC world is making a bed. This requires one to either (A) have sheep milling around, or (B) kill an assload of giant spiders. As I was just freshly birthed, naked and unarmed, into this world, the latter wasn’t an option. Also, fuck those giant spiders.
So I start punching the hell outta some trees. Gotta make some axes so I can get wood a little faster (*immature laughter*). Once I feel like I have enough wood, I craft a boat, and set sail toward the sunrise, because eff that island. Shit! I left my crafting table back there. Whatever, I have enough wood to make another. Oh, good. Coming up on a large landmass. Here I come, food and cloth! My boat butts up on the land too hard and explodes into a handfull of planks and a stick. Solid craftsmanship, bro. I climb a small sand embankment to see…I’ve arrived in a desert biome. God. Damn it.