Sucker Punch Trailer Provides Eye-Diabetes

The full length trailer for Zack Snyder’s Donkey Sucker Punch has been released (after the jump).  There is whole damn lot going on there, and it all looks like pure eye-candy. And eye-candy is something Mr. Snyder is good at, especially the super-duper slow-mo kind.  I’ve been burned by him before (didn’t care for his take on Watchmen), but this is all his own original material; he’s not trying to interpret (read: f*ck up) something I already love.  I believe that is a first for him, so lets take a look at what he’s got:

Um…wow? Like I said, a lot going on, but lets try to break down some of the cooler stuff, in order of appearance:

  • Hot protagonist chick
  • Led Zep on the soundtrack
  • Creepy mental institution, which is…
  • …holy sh*t, filled with other hot chicks!
  • Carla Gugino
  • Crazy dream worlds
  • Fantasy warfare with, um, Nazi’s, I think
  • Dragons, okay.
  • Wow. Robots. Really? Where did those come from?
  • Samurai’s…I think, uh, there’s a giant one with a Gatling gun there…
  • Mechs suits? Come on!
  • Floating trains…going to…futuristic cities? Okay, you know what…

…I can’t keep up with this. The 12 year old in me is telling me this looks bad-ass, and I’m going to tentatively agree, but I’ll be g*ddamned if I know what the hell is going on here.  I’ll just have to see it for myself. Snyder was recently hired to direct the new Superman movie, and based on this trailer alone, I’d say the third act will feature:  Superman firing twin rocket launchers at an invading force of Space T-Rex Ninjas with jet-packs, then sexing up every female member of the Justice League (twice), before solving a rubiks cube without peeling the stickers off first. Crazy, right?

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